NO EVIL FAIRIES

I saw a student entering my classroom with a book. This shocked me. A student with a book…and not a book assigned by any class. This student is actually reading…get this…wait for it…FOR FUN!?! Unbelievable.

Anyway, I snidely asked the student if her book was about vampires. Seems most of the books my students are reading these days are about vampires…grim, dark-humored emo pansy vampires.

This student recoiled in horror and said, “NO…this book is not about vampires (she said with great indignation). It’s about evil fairies.”

Evil Fairies. I have never heard of evil fairies. And the thought of them scares me. And then I realized I don’t have a class rule against evil fairies. So here you go…another addendum to my class rules…

NO EVIL FAIRIES.

I hope that clears up any ambiguity about evil fairies in my classroom.

Thanks,

Mr. White

picture: yes...I, Mr. White, created the graphic on this post using microsoft paint. I am awesome. I am a graphic-design master...I am, oh nevermind.

What Happens In La Brea Tar Pits...

Love this t-shirt from McSweeneys

Rest in Peace Milburn/Antioch

I was reading my old hometown newspaper's website (kcstar.com) when I ran across a story about my old school district. I clicked on the story and was horrified to discover that the Shawnee Mission School District will be closing down my old middle school next year. Antioch Middle School will be murdered as an entity due to budgetary contraints resulting from declining enrollment. When I attended AMS we had about 750 students. Today there is less than 450. This decline in enrollment is district wide. In 1970 the SMSD had 45,000 students. Today the SMSD has around 23,000 students district wide. Not quite sure what's going on in Johnson County...I've been in Texas the last 12 years.

Antioch Middle School was originally built in 1955 as Milburn Junior High on land domained from the Milburn Country Club. It was a beautiful setting for a school and I often allowed my gaze to wander out the window during math class to watch the bourgeosie play golf. I even caddied at the club for a brief time. I was a proud Milburn Trojan my 7th Grade year. But the next summer they shut down nearby (an early foreshadowing of Milburn's fate) Old Mission Junior High, brought their students to us and converted all the junior highs in the district to middle schools. All 9th Graders moved to the high schools and the middle schools housed only 7th and 8th graders.

They changed the name of Milburn to the boring name of Antioch Middle School (Nancy Kassabaum Middle School was also in the running). They changed the mascot and all the old traditions. They took off a giant Trojan Soldier sculpture off the front wall and ripped out the Trojan Warrior embedded in the front lobby tiles...the one that if you stepped on you would be beaten up by older students. Milburn was dead and Antioch born...until now when they plan to kill it off completely next year.

To add insult to injury all those Antioch students will now be shipped to our hated arch rivals...Hocker (as in hocking a loogie) Grove Middle School. Hocker...the dump that got to keep their school's name in 1986 because of the rabid parent protests. That's like shutting down OU and sending all the students to ut if not actually a million times worse.

The news of this closing depressed me more than I would have guessed. Schools house a lot of memories. There is nothing sadder than an empty classroom or an empty school building. Think about the millions of stories that took place in those rooms. At least we'll have the memories. The last time I saw the building was seven years ago...and then we only passed by on the road. I'm thinking I may have to make one last pilgrimage before the end comes. At least my 8th Grade Record in the 440 meter four-man relay will now be frozen forever never to be broken.


R.I.P. Milburn Junior High 1955-1986
R.I.P. Antioch Middle School 1986-2011

Weezer Day #8

Today Weezer released their 8th album "Hurley" named after a character on one of my favorite (and recently ended) shows LOST. Hugo "Hurley" Ramos appears on the cover...aka Jorge Garcia.

Great album...closer to Pinkerton than anything they've done in a long long time.

Singh is King

Pulled out of Walmart behind a man in a small pickup truck this evening. The driver was apparently South Asian in ethnicity...I'm guessing India. He had the coolest back window decal ever.

Singh is King.

A Heathen Love Story

So the other night a tornado touched down in Seagoville. The news warned that it was heading to Forney. Channel 8’s Pete Delkus helpfully advised that if you had children in Forney to put their bicycle helmets on. We were at the dinner table eating salmon and steamed broccoli and couldn’t be bothered with such trivialities. We sat, ate and watched the rain with a window open to let out smoke from a burning piece of fish in the broiler.

Then it got darker and darker…and there it was.

About 300 yards east of us…past the goat farm…in direct sight of our dining room window, full rotation of a tornado in the sky. Hooks and fingers of clouds swirling with malign intent like a witch’s hand over her cauldron.

Kim said “Is that a tornado?” I said “I think it is.” But I spoke with great uncertainty because there were no sirens blaring as usual in such events in Forney. I didn’t know then that they were malfunctioning (I bet the football scoreboard works great!) and would remain silent.

Kim asked if we should take cover. I had already cleared out our one and only interior closet ready to dive in. The cats were closed up in the study. But the lack of sirens and wind convinced us to finish the wonderful salmon. It was eerily calm and I figured we could shelter within seconds if things started getting crazy.

So the three of us ate in silence and followed the stirring whirlpool in the clouds that minutes earlier had destroyed a Seagoville man’s classic red ‘vette. It moved left to right heading slowly north and soon the sun peeked through the trailing clouds.

Meanwhile the vast and ancient gulf between urbanity and rurality reared it’s ugly head as another tornado hit Dallas proper. All news outlets immediately and swiftly forgot about Kaufman County. Kicked to the curb we were! Not a mention of points east for over 30 minutes despite the still threatening tornado in the clouds over downtown Forney. It was an apalling lack of concern about our welfare. It was if we had been erased from existence. Surely they could have utilized split screens or something.

But as the tornado headed north toward Rockwall it also passed over the small hamlet of Heath…ironic since the word heathen comes from heath. Heathen…a term which ancient town dwellers used to prejoratively label those outside the town’s influence and who lived on the heath ground cover. These ”outsiders” were viewed as barbaric, Godless and uncivilized.

I guess that’s how “civilized” Dallas feels about us heathen eastsiders in the year C.E. 2010. Ah, us heathens are accustomed to the prejudice of our fickle neighbors to the west.

Televangelist or Dental Product?

"Lists" is a regular feature on the online literary journal McSweeney's Internet Tendency. Here is a recent list for your reading entertainment...


Televangelist or Dental Product?

BY MIKE HARDING

1. Popoff
2. Orajel
3. Osteen
4. Duplantis
5. Elmex
6. Biotene
7. Paulk
8. Clinpro
9. Dr. Collins
10. Quiboloy


Televangelists: 1, 3, 4, 7, 10
Dental Products: 2, 5, 6, 8, 9

Killer Pencils

Love this picture I saw on Boing Boing. These are Woody Guthrie inspired pencils. He had this phrase engraved on his guitar...Oh yeah, Woody was from Oklahoma.

The Forum is up and running...

School started back up this past week. So my school blog, The Forum, is now back up and running. This year I'm envisioning the blog as more of an online literary journal focusing on the humanities in general. Students will be encouraged to submit anything from opinion pieces, short fiction, poetry, photographs, drawings, thoughts on history, etc...

I'm focusing a lot on the Humanities because that is now my area of study. My Masters will be a Masters of Liberal Studies concentrating on the Humanities. If I do indeed go on to doctoral work most likely I'll pursue a PhD in Humanities at The University of Texas Dallas. That of course could change with the wind. First things first...let's get the Masters done...and that may take awhile.

Anyway, Dave Egger's online literary journal, McSweeney's Internet Tendency, is serving as the current muse for such online meanderings.


photo: The new Wyly Theatre in Dallas. I snapped this photo a few months back while I wandering the streets of Dallas while Kimberly was attending a nearby convention.

The Bull's Revenge

Speaking of Spain...this is real video of a bull leaping into the stands in a Northern Spain bullring last week. Catalunya just recently outlawed bullfighting. As someone who has witnessed a bull fight in person...it was about time. It is unbelievably cruel. This video is amazing...I'm rooting for the bull.

The Bird's Revenge

This alternate ending to Hitchcock's The Birds was filmed at the Placa Catalunya in Barcelona where I used to hang out a lot in 1996-1997. Hitchcock I think would approve.

current iPod stuff

I always find the playlist "Top 25 Most Played" on my iPod fascinating. Many of the songs I don't remember listening to that often. A few aren't even favorites of mine. Of course the list changes just about every time I play the thing. The list is just a snapshot. Here is the current Top 25. Weezer heavy as usual but an unusual amount of Buddy Holly and Ry Cooder. Newest discoveries are Surfer Blood and Kirsty MacColl (who died in 2000...I'm slow to discovering the good stuff sometimes.).


Everyday - Buddy Holly
Dearest - Buddy Holly
3 Cool Cats - Ry Cooder
I'm Your Daddy - Weezer
Trippin' Down the Freeway -Weezer
Love is the Answer - Weezer
D'yer Maker - Sheryl Crow
(If You're Wondering if I Want You to) I want you to - Weezer
Girl On My Mind - Buddy Holly
The Girl Got Hot - Weezer
I Melt With You - Modern English
Onda Callejera - Ry Cooder
Let it All Hang Out - Weezer
Besame Mucho (Live) - Raul Malo
Once in a Lifetime - Talking Heads
Can't Stop Partying - Weezer
Island Girl - The Beach Boys
Got You (Where I Want You) - They Flys
Blue Turns to Grey - The Rolling Stones
Time Is On My Side - The Rolling Stones
Los Chucos Suaves - Ry Cooder
Beverly Hills - Weezer
Tighten Up - The Black Keys
In These Shoes - Kristy MacColl
Catholic Pagans - Surfer Blood

The Sked

So I got my sked for this school year. It's exactly the same as last year's which is beyond wonderful. Notice how my lunch backs into my conference period...meaning there's an hour and half block in the early afternoon. Most of my day is in the morning which is when I function best in the classroom. This makes me very happy. The only thing that would have been better would be closing the day with a WHAP class. A few years ago I had a 7th Period WHAP and it was a great way to end the school day. But this is almost perfect...no complaints at all.

1st Period: World History
2nd Period: World History
3rd Period: AP World History
4th Period: AP World History

D Lunch (12:16-12:46)

5th Period: Conference
6th Period: AP European History
7th Period: World History.

The Grind

Back to work today. Didn't blog much this summer...believe it or not I kept too busy this summer...and when I had computer time I wasn't motivated to type...I just wanted to browse.

This school year will be slam-bang busy. Busier than ever. Added to the usual grind is grad school. I haven't done real homework in fourteen years. Plus the Lion-Lamb Fellowship, the Kaufman Center for Human Rights, family and work...life will roll by in a blink. But I'm actually looking forward to it.

Grad school. Felt weird when the clerk at student services called me a student. I'm usually the teacher. It will be nice to be on the other side of the equation. And those student I.D. discounts will be nice at the movie theater.

Book Cheating

Often I'm in the middle of a book but then I either get another one or two as a gift or I buy them. And I'm really anxious to start them. But I only read one at a time...a hard fast fule of mine. So I put the new books aside and begin obsessively reading the old book simply in order to finish it so I can ge to the new ones despite the fact that the book may be decent or even great. The new ones were bought in an inspired moment and are shrouded in mystery...which usually disappoints. I feel like I'm using the old book...that I'm only spending time with it...not for its own sake but so I can move on to the chimera of bigger and better things. That's how I am with Sedaris right now with Mitchell and Eggers on the nightstand. Sorry man. Nothing personal.

Three-Year Old Requests

This week Jackson is a member of the Green Apples Class (3 and 4 year olds) at our church's Vacation Bible School. Kimberly is their teacher. Last night the three kids in the class shared their very specific prayer requests during prayer time.

Emily - To keep her family from getting sick

Alex - To learn how to drive

Jackson - To roar louder.

photo: JDW and his cousins Jackie and Avery in Indiana

Video from Clearwater Beach

Here's a video of Jackson on the balcony of our hotel in Clearwater Beach, Florida. I took the camera directly from our air-conditioned room into the humidity of Florida. You can see the camera fogging up.

USA! Goal! We're in!

Now this is what I call waiting until the last minute! Actually...waiting until AFTER the last minute...the 91st minute to be exact. You can't wait much later to score a goal. I was depressed. I thought the Yanks were done. Then came this amazing sequence and one of the greatest goals scored by the United States. Great Great Stuff! Landon Donovan!

Webless Living

So I was reading THIS article about a new book coming out that looks at the effect that the internet has on our brains. I was intrigued by the topic because I was in Colorado at the time for the AP World History grading. Without my laptop and internet access my nights would be almost unbearable. After the grading I'd hang out with the crew and go to other activities. But when the sun went down I usually headed to my room and browsed the net for a couple of hours. I would watch TED talks and lectures or youtube videos. I would catch up with friends on facebook or whatever. I'd send video emails to my wife and son. The idea of not having internet access the nine days I was in Colorado just seemed unthinkable. What would I do differently if I didn't have a web connection was the question I asked myself.

Well, I lived a year in Spain without a laptop, internet access of any kind and no iPod. This was back in 1996-1997...in the tech dark ages. I didn't even have a phone at my flat. I had to use a phone booth down the street if I wanted to make a call. And you know what? Life was great.

Not having any entertainment in my flat (no TV even!) forced me out into the city to explore. I read a whole heck of a lot more. I finished a Tolstoy, Turgenev and a Dostoeyevsky. I journaled a ton and wrote real letters to friends and family back home. I listened to Barcelona radio. I didn't even know what I was missing.

If I made that trip today...my experience would be a lot different. I'd have my iPod, laptop, cell phone and what have you. I would probably miss out on much of the experience of being out in a foreign city.

Fortunately that experience encouraged me to head out most nights in Fort Collins. I either hung out with friends, walked around the town or enjoyed just looking at the mountains. But it was tempting just to go back and play on the computer. I really wonder what the long term effects of our internet addiction will have on future generations.

TBK on Fallon

On May 30th the Black Keys performed on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon the night after they performed on Letterman. They played a few songs but only two aired on the show. This song was only made available online. Great tune from their new album which is wicked cool.

More Creative Talk

A few days ago I directed you to a TED talk link of Sir Ken Robinson speaking about the need for a revolution in our education system. That talk was a follow-up to this legendary talk a few years ago. Check out this video...only 20 minutes long and very inspiring.

The Rules of Powerpoint

I was speaking to colleagues in Colorado about the proper use of powerpoint in the classroom. When done correctly powerpoint presentations can greatly enhance your discussion. I don't know how I ever lived without it. Unfortunately most of the powerpoints that you see are boring, lame and take away from the presentation.

The New York Times recently published an article about how the U.S. Army is now eschewing powerpoint because they think over reliance on the platform muddies thinking and confuses issues. An infamous slide (shown above) from an army briefing in Afghanistan reportedly had our commanding General saying "when we understand that slide, we'll have won the war."

I follow several rules in my presentations. I borrowed some of these rules from the 10/20/30 rule of powerpoint. No more than 10 slides, 20 minutes and no less than 30 font. Every one of my slides has a picture, photograph, chart or map...some type of helpful graphic. I use very little special effects...no machine gun bulleting letters on the screen or whirling titles. I keep the bullets short and simple...they're simply to spark discussion.

Unfortunately, even many of the university lectures I've attended in the recent past violate most of these rules...and their ppts come off lame. Here are two good articles about good powerpoint presentations...

The 10/20/30 Rule of Powerpoint

Presentation Zen

Hunting Modern Day Benedict Arnolds

Today the Yanks play England in the World Cup. Hoping that some of that 1950 mojo finds it way to the current squad. During the reading I saw several guys throughout the week wearing England soccer jerseys. Finally I got fed up and began to call them on it. I told three different guys "Dude...any other time of the year that would be a cool jersey to wear...but we are playing those guys in a week. You gotta represent the USA...otherwise you're just a Benedict Arnold."

Most responded that come game day they'd be sporting an American kit. Except for the last guy...as soon as he talked I knew this was a different story...He was an actual Brit. I said "that's cool...you're an authentic...but I still hope we kick your rears just like we did in 1783." Only at a WHAP reading would you trashtalk using historical references from 200 years ago.

Cultivating Creativity

I love TED Talks. Each speaker only has 18 minutes to blow your mind. Sir Ken Robinson blew away the TED conference several years ago with his call for education reform. It was an extremely informative and inspiring talk. Earlier this year he came back to the TED conference and blew away the crowd again with a call for a revolution in education and cultivating creativity. I'm currently reading his book The Element. Check out this video if you want to be inspired. His talk lasts about 17 minutes.

Darth Vader and Personality Disorder

Turns out Anakin Skywalker had borderline personality disorder...that's what turned him into Darth Vader. Interesting article at CNN.com HERE.

Wrapping up in Fort Collins

Things are about done here at Colorado State University. I've had a great eight days. The reading went much smoother this year. The weather was perfect. The 850 readers are reading at a superfast pace and we expect to be done early...around noon...compared to 5:00 pm last year on the last day.

I won't be able to fly out early so I'll just enjoy my last afternoon in the mountains loungin' in the sun and hanging with the crew (some who are pictured above).

I added a few pics to my flickr account HERE. There are few photos of the pack of foxes that live next to Summit Hall where I stayed.

I also blogged on my school blog throughout the past week HERE.

Feeling pretty good. Got word today that I've been accepted to Southern Methodist University's graduate program. I will be working on a Masters in Humanities with a concentration in history. Been a long time since I've been a student. Hey...I'll get a student ID! Cheaper tix at the movies! I guess grad school tuition is worth it!

Back in Colo

So I'm back in Fort Collins, Colorado to grade AP World History exams. I will be blogging daily for my students on my school blog HERE. So click on the link to see how the reading is going.

The Black Keys on Letterman

Last night one of my favorite bands, The Black Keys, played on Letterman. Jackson loves this song. He calls it "The Dinosaur Song" because the original preview video featured a dinosaur puppet. Great band.

Already LOST

The final episode of LOST was an epic end to an epic series. I've had a lot of shows that I greatly enjoyed and was saddened when they finally came to an end. But the passing of LOST saddens me a bit more than the passing of any other show...and it wasn't even my favorite show of all time.

The show although not perfect in it's six year run...was amazing. When LOST was on top of its game...which was most of the time...it was breathtaking. We'll never see a show of its like again.

There are also people who I work with with whom I have nothing in common but a love of the show LOST. Now that it is over...I'm not sure what we'll talk about when I bump into them in the teacher's lounge.

I will also miss the network of blogs, websites and columnists devoted to exploring all the dimensions of LOST. All the forums and debates will peter out in the next few weeks now that the show has wrapped. Sure, we can all watch LOST on DVD...but the MOMENT is gone. The zietgeist moves on.

I will miss these characters. I will miss the grand scope of the show. I will miss the mythology. I will miss the spiritual, philosophical and literary allusions. Most of all I will miss the characters. A whole generation of t.v. watchers were connected by this show...and it's now time for us to walk out those church doors into the white light.

I already miss it.

Feel a Draft?

Three Sooners taken in the first four picks of the NFL Draft? Freakin' amazing. Congrats Sam on being taken number one. Guess going back to school wasn't such a bad move. The Rams aren't great...but I'd rather be there than in Detroit which is where he would have gone last year. Also...three Oklahoma natives are going in the first round. Oklahoma has 3% of the American population. Quality over quantity!

Urban Sprawl

According the Dallas Morning News, Kaufman County where I reside, was the fortieth fastest growing county in the entire United States. Our northern neighbor Rockwall County, about three miles north of our house, was the third fastest growing county in the United States last year.

Just in my town (Forney) alone we have seen amazing growth. When we moved to Forney in 2001 there were only 5,000 residents. In 2010 we now have 13,500 residents and the rate of growth is actually increasing. We opened a new second high school this year.

Good things that come from this growth are new amenities such as a new community park, new restaurants, movie theaters, stores and shops. The bad side...traffic headaches, road construction and infrastructure expansion. Our city is barely recognizable from the sleepy town that lived just outside the DFW monster. Now the monster has creeped up on us and we are a part of the sprawl.

photo: This hawk landed on our neighbors yard a few weeks back. Won't see many more hawks if the population keeps exploding!

The Tan Tax

One of the provisions I'm happiest about in the new health care bill is the tax on tanning. Starting soon tanning salons must charge a 10% tax on artificial tanning. This tax will go to help pay for key components of the overall health care bill.

This was a fantastic idea. As a high school teacher I have been preaching against artificial tanning for years. So many of my students, male and female, indulge in the practice regularily...but even moreso during the weeks leading up to prom. Tanning has been scientifically proven beyond a shadow of a doubt to have serious health implications...especially in regards to causing skin cancer.

Skin cancer and the other health issues associated with tanning pose a drain on our health care system and divert funds from other health research. Hopefully placing a 10% tax on these beds will serve as a nice deterrant to a practice that is entirely based on vanity and is extremely dangerous. I would expect millions of dollars to be raised from these taxes. And if the tanning business collapses...then that wouldn't be so bad either.

Unfortunately, my high school had their prom last month...too late to fall under the new tanning tax. Maybe the prom organizers knew something.

Ridin' the Boat

Over Spring Break we went to Steamboat Springs, Colorado to ski. It was Jackson's first ride on an airplane ("jetplane" if you ask him.) and he loved it. Both going and returning Jackson loved flying.

It was also his first ski trip. He was a bit too young for ski school so we just got him some equipment one morning and slid down the beginner's slope for an hour. He enjoyed it but we'll put him in ski school next year. He really enjoyed simply riding in the gondola on our last day there.

We did have the unusual experience of not being able to ski one day due to weather. Our second day there the mountain was shut down all day due to 80 mph winds. I was bummed about the lost opp to make tracks but it was a relaxing day. The two days we did get to hit the slopes...we hit it hard. The trails were a bit icy in the morning but softened up nicely by mid-morning. We cruised mainly blues and hit the Tomahawk moguls several times that last day. I'm really liking moguls. I've gotten to the point where I hate the easy narrow greens. They go on and on and on and the going is extremely slow. So we mainly hit the wide steep blues where you could really carve some nice turns.

Steamboat's a nice resort. After being bought out by Intrawest Resorts (who own Vail, Breck, Key, etc...) they've had a huge infusion of cash. Lots of improvements built in the last few years. Our lodge was about a five minute walk from the gondola. We usually took the free shuttle anyway. Storing the gear overnight at the base was very nice.

I will definately consider Steamboat again.

Classroom Management: Turf Management

I'm nine weeks away from completing my 11th year of teaching. The question I often I hear is "don't you get tired of the classroom discipline issues?" My response is that I rarely have discipline issues in my classes any more. My first year was a disaster as I was too lax. My second year was quite a bit better although I was a bit too strict. The third year was leaps and bound better...but it all came together in my fourth year.

Seriously...I average sending one to three students to the office a year. That's it. The classroom is the least stressful part of my job. Sure, some are more naturally adapted to classroom management than others. But a lot can be learned. It took me years to get to this place. Good classroom management requires experience and proactivity. You have to anticipate issues before they arise. You must be the one in control of the initiative...not the students.

There are many components to good classroom management. But I'll discuss one in detail today.

You must establish your turf.

Before the first day of school I number each one of my desks. Then on the first day of school I stand at my classroom door with a class roster which is already conveniently numbered by the office. I simply ask the student what their name is and send them to the desk that corresponds with their number.

This demonstrates immediately that you're in charge. Most students will go straight to their assigned desks and sit there until the bell rings because that's all they know to do. This keeps students from wandering around and getting into trouble before your first class of the year begins. When the bell rings there is no mad dash for desks and you can get started much more expediently.

By assigning desks on the first day you've already established your turf and the hierarchial structure. Yes, the chart is often alphabetical and you might have to make adjustments within a few class days. But usually my seating chart stays fairly intact for the entire school year.

The small effort of creating a seating chart reaps big dividends in terms of healthy classroom management. Psychologically you have already shown the initiative before the school year has begun and demonstrated to the students that the rule of law exists in this particular classroom.

The name is...

I used to watch this scene...from Dr. No before any event that I felt nervous about...prom, job interviews, first day of school...

It's the first time the legendary line was used. Classic.

Another Snow Video

Here's another vid from the snow day a couple of weeks ago...

Olympic Quick Hits

Some Winter Olympic Quickhits...

Very glad that Bode Miller won three medals at the Vancouver games. I'm a big fan of Miller and thought the media piled up on him a bit too gratuitously in Torino. Bode is undisputedly the greatest American alpine skiier of all time.

I was also glad that Julia Mancuso was able to win two silvers despite being overshadowed by the publicity seeking drama queen Lindsey Vonn.

Supercool that the South Korean gold medal winning figure skater skated her short skate to James Bond music.

Jackson's favorite Olympic sport by far was the ski-cross...which made it's Olympic debut this year.

I've finally come to accept snowboarding as a true Olympic sport...but I still can't stand short-track skating. I'm still up in the air (pun intended) about freestyle ski aerials and mogul skiing (with the jumps) as legit Olympic level sports.

The Russians aren't trained in good sportsmanship...latest example...that blowhard Plushenko whining about not getting gold. Skating is not a one trick show. Sure, quads are great...but there's more to the sport than managing one trick.

The closing ceremonies were awful. I can't stand Michael Buble and his stage antics. And the Canucks reinforced every Canadian stereotype...giant moose, beavers, mounties and hockey players? Really? That's all you got to proud of? That and drunk cigar smoking female hockey players I guess. Guess you have to proud of something. I've been to Canada and think it's one of the most amazing places I've ever been. Canada deserved a better representation of their culture in the closing show.

Overall I enjoyed these games. Vancouver seems like a fantastic city. Despite some of the glitches I'd rather see an Olympics there than in Sochi, Russia.

Splits

This is an old joke. I recently saw it again on Doug Pagitt's blog. It always makes me laugh...


I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off.

So I ran over and said, “Stop! Don’t do it!”

“Why shouldn’t I?” he said.

I said, “Well, because there’s so much to live for!”

He said, “Like what?”

I said, “Well, are you religious or atheist?”

He said, “Religious.”

I said, “Me too! Are your Christian or Buddhist?”

He said, “Christian.”

I said, “Me too! Are you Catholic or Protestant?”

He said, “Protestant."

I said, Me too!

Are your Episcopalian or Baptist?

He said, “Baptist!”

I said, “Wow! Me too! Are your Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?

He said, Baptist Church of God!”

I said, “That’s great, me too! Are your Original Baptist Church of God or are you Reformed Baptist Church of God?”

He said, “Reformed Baptist Church of God!”

I said, “Me too! Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915?”

He said, “Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915!”

I said, “Die, you heretic scum!” and then I pushed him off.

Snow Day!!!

We don't get snow days in Texas! Today we received 10 inches of snow...a Dallas record! School is cancelled tomorrow...which is Kimberly's birthday...what a nice gift from God. We played in the snow after school today. Made a snowman and had snowfights. More snow here than in Vancouver! Here is some video...

iPad? Really?

I have to admit I'm not too impressed with the new Apple iPad. I watched the video of Steve Job's presentation and was left underwhelmed. Part of this is due to the frenzied hype leading up to the announcement. Another factor is the horrible name for this new device. iPad? Really? Brings to mind more unpleasant technological devices. Somebody in Apple Marketing should be fired.

But I'm mainly underwhelmed because I was expecting a new type of computer. However, the largest amount of storage for this thing is 64 gigs. That's half the size of my iPod. It does not possess a DVD/CD drive. I haven't seen it up close so I don't know if it has a USB port or not. If it doesn't then it's pretty much worthless to me.

All the thing seems to do is to be a great web browser. Ebooks...don't like 'em. Music player? The thing's too big...I'll keep my iPod. Doesn't even have a camera for skypeing or video chats. It's basically a $600 web browser /videogame device/ video player.

Maybe it will set the template for cooler things to come. But right now? It's just a toy for the rich or gadget hounds.

Say No to Leno

I watched the Oprah interview of Jay Leno and came away with the following reaction: The guy really is a conniving, self-serving narcissict. He tries very hard to present the everyman persona...but in reality he is as slick as any other hollywood shark.

Despite Jay's protestations here's the reality: Back in 2004 Leno wanted to retire. He agreed to give the show up in 2009. NBC quickly signed up Conan to succeed him to avoid a repeat of the 1992 Letterman vs. Leno Late Shift Mess. But as 2009 approaches Leno gets cold feet. He decides he doesn't want to leave the television business. He even told Oprah that he can't imagine not being on the air and predicted that she won't retire in 2012 like she has announced. Of course he wrapped this up in the humanitarian desire to keep his staff employed. But Conan wisely had signed a succession contract. NBC was obligated to give Conan The Tonight Show.

So NBC gives Leno is own show in primetime. The show bombs. Conan's show is still in infancy and has yet to build an audience. Remember it took him a couple of years to build up his Late Night audience back in the early 90's. In fact he was almost cancelled within a month of going on the air. But NBC showed remarkable patience and Late Night gradually became a hit with Conan O'Brien at the helm.

So with The Tonight Show dropping off in ratings Leno played his hand and demanded his old job back. And he got it.

Now the story he's spinning is that NBC told him in 2004 that they wanted to replace him with Conan and basically strong armed him into the five year retirement plan. He said he told a "white lie" to his audience that he wanted to retire but he never really wanted to. He states that he felt betrayed by NBC for wanting him to replace with Conan. He felt that he was being fired despite being #1 for over a decade.

What a load of crock. There is NO way that NBC back in 2004 says to Leno they want him gone in favor of Conan. Late Night's ratings were good...but not at Tonight Show levels. Plus, Leno was the undisputed king of the ratings (more proof that America is stupid).

All Leno had to do was to say no to the (fictional) deal. ABC was looking to replace Nightline. They or FOX would have jumped at the chance to get Leno from NBC. There is NO way NBC would try to force out Leno in favor of Conan.

But Leno has been shocked at the backlash. So he is revising history. He's trying to now paint Conan as the usurper. He's now saying he wants to keep his job to save the jobs of his staff (despite decimating Conan's staff and the thousands of people who work in network dramas who lost their jobs when the Jay Leno Show took over their primetime slots). He's saying he's been cancelled twice...which is completely ridiculous since NBC has given him three shots now at a show.

He has proven (although this was proven back in 1992 as well) to be a hubris filled liar with a persecution complex. This has been rumored to be true for decades...now it's out in the open. What a bum. Either he's completely delusional or he's a machiavellian operator under the guise of a blue collar everyman (despite his $800 million dollar networth). Oh yeah, one more thing...he tried to gain pity from Oprah saying he lives off the income he makes as a stand-up comic. All the Tonight Show money goes to the bank or to some charitable foundations he runs. Cry me a freaking river.

R.I.P. J.D. Salinger

Got news that author J.D. Salinger died earlier today. Towering writer yet shunned all the fame. He lived the last several decades in seclusion outside of Cornish, New Hampshire.

I only read "Catcher in the Rye" and his collection of short stories "Nine Stories" But they had a huge impact on me. Part of the Salinger legend revolves around the idea that there are rooms full of manuscripts in his farm house. Be interesting to see if they ever see the light of day.

4 and 12

Well the Chiefs had a lousy 4 and 12 season. However, I'm actually feeling pretty good as a Chiefs fan. The poor season was not unexpected. There were many close games and they ended strong with a beat down of Denver. Two former Longhorns (cough) stood up and became stars...Jamaal Charles and Derrick Johnson.

But with the hiring of both Charlie Weis and Romeo Crennell as OC and DC...the Chiefs should be much improved next year. I didn't like Weis's hubris at Notre Dame but he was a heck of a coordinator. And Crennel was given a difficult job in Cleveland but still retains his defensive reputation. Both former head coaches will be able to help Haley as he continues to learn on the job.

There's also another top five draft pick this year. Super early prediction: 8 and 8 next year. That would be an amazing jump for this team as the Pioli-Haley era kicks off in earnest.


Photo: gotta love the old Chiefs logo used from 1963-1971. Unabashedly Politically Incorrect before people knew what that meant!

Movie Disappointments

For some reason yesterday I was thinking of the biggest movie disappointments during my lifetime. I'm speaking of movies in which I held high hopes and was let down immensely. Here are few that come to mind...

Goldeneye: The trailers looked amazing. It was the rebirth of 007 after a six year hiatus. But the plot was third grade and the final action set piece revolving around running over a big satellite dish was boring. The industrial flavored musical score was terrible. The trailers held showed so much promise that even now if I see one I think...I should give Goldeneye another look only to be disappointed again. And again. And again.


Hudson Hawk: This movie looked like it was going to combine the action DieHard Bruce Willis with the comedic genius Moonlighting Bruce Willis. Supercool James Coburn was cast as a badguy. But the movie fell completely flat. Unfunny jokes and stupid musical numbers equal lame flick.


Black Rain: Michael Douglas at the peak of the mid-80's Wall Street years and up and coming Andy Garcia fresh off The Untouchables in a Japanese Yakuza/Triad gangster flick set in Tokyo? On paper - awesome. On the screen...slow, ponderous and sleep inducing except for that cool scene when Garcia gets decapitated in a parking garage by a motorcycle riding Yakuza hood.
The Big Bounce: An Elmore Leonard book. Great cast with Owen Wilson, Morgan Freeman, Gary Sinese, Charlie Sheen and even freakin' Willie Nelson set in beautiful Hawaii! The screenplay botched both the story and Elmore dialogue.

The new Star Wars movies: Jar Jar Binks. Pansy Anakin. Bad acting. Terrible dialogue. I am still ticked at George Lucas for this disgusting missed opportunity. Could have been another Lord of the Rings. Ended up being Lord of the Crap.

The Pirates of the Caribbean sequels: Couldn't understand the creole and pirate accents. The F/X way overdone. Totally lost the charm of the original. I still have yet to pay to see the third one since the second one was so bad.

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of Crystal Skull: Lucas, Spielberg and Harrison Ford? How do you mess this up? Well you throw in stupid Shia LaBOOF, Kate's really bad haircut and bad Russian accent, monster fire ants and aliens from outer space? Aliens? Really!?! I almost cried to see Indiana Jones reduced to this tripe.

The Godfather Part III: Actually not too terrible...just pales considerably to the first two classics. Sophia Coppola, who's gone on to direct some awesome movies of her own, has been beaten down for years over her performance so I won't pile on. Okay, yes I will...her scenes make me puke (But I've forgiven her for her movie "Lost in Translation"). I don't understand why Pacino sounds like he's growling when he talks (very similar to Batman's voice in the new Christian Bale versions) and Bridget Fonda is just too light weight to be in a Godfather movie.

Have fun with Jesus!

Many of you know that my Grandfather White passed away last December. After much discussion we decided to take our three year old son to the funeral. Kimberly would keep him in the back of the sanctuary while I sat up front. We also wouldn't let him go up to the casket. We thought he was too young for that.

We did tell Jackson that his Great Grandpa White had gone to live with Jesus up in Heaven. That was about as far as we were willing to discuss it with him at this time in his life.

We also took him to the graveside service although Kimberly and Jackson stayed in the back of the crowd while I was closer to the front. As expected he got a bit squirmy and Kim began walking him back to the car so he wouldn't be a disturbance to others during the short grave site ceremony.

As they were walking off, my three year old son turns back and yells "GOODBYE GREAT GRANDPA...HAVE FUN WITH JESUS!"

I don't think most heard what he said. At first I cringed...but then thought no...that's a perfect sentiment for a believer in Christ. I couldn't have said it better myself.

I'm With Coco

Team Conan!

Once again Jay Leno is trying to screw The Tonight Show and ruin late night television. Leno likes to play the everyman persona but he is as ruthless and ambitious as the most machiavellian Medicis. He stole Letterman's rightful place as host of The Tonight Show. It was well known that Johnny Carson wanted Letterman to follow in his foot steps. After Carson died it was revealed that Carson had submitted jokes to be used in Letterman's dialogue on The Late Show. Although Carson never appeared on any show as an interviewed guest after his retirement he made many cameos on The Late Show. He never gave Leno his blessing.

But Leno used his backroom savvy to score the desk. The show devolved into lame humor and was aimed at the moronic jocularity I guess is popular with the proletarian masses. Jaywalking and the Dancing Itos strove for the lowest common denominator and proudly reached it.

Although I prefer Letterman to Conan, Conan is stratospherically more intelligent and witty in his humor than Leno. O'Brien's monologues are actually funnier in my opinion than even Letterman's. But they may be too surreally absurd for the literally minded. Leno is the Three Stooges, Letterman Ernie Kovacs and O'Brien The Marx Brothers. I hope I didn't offend Stooge fans.

Now intellegent America is being given the shaft again. Not only do we have to endure Sarah Palin and Glenn Beck on FOX we may have to endure Leno back at 10:30 (CST). I'm tired of smart America being ignored in favor of the ignorant masses. Fight back against Leno's America and join Team Conan! If I sound elitist...so freakin' be it! Conservatives deserve better than Palin and Beck and Liberals deserve better than Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi. America deserves intelligent humor like O'Brien and Letterman. The time of stupid America is over!

Quote of the Week

Interesting quote by one of my students talking about hunting over the holidays...





"I like to shoot em, but I don't like to eat em."





Ansley
KHS class of 2012.

Weezer on the Tonight Show last week...

Here's the Mighty Weez on Conan...

The 2009 Book List

Well here it is...the final list of what I read in 2009. I'm already excited about 2010's reading list!

Number 9 Dream by David Mitchell

The Republic by Plato

The Prince of the Marshes (and other occupational hazards of a year in Iraq) by Rory Stewart

The Dharma Bums by Jack Kerouac

Wild at Heart by John Eldridge

The Fortune of War (Sixth in the Master and Commander series) by Patrick O'Brian

No Logo by Naomi Klein

The Road to Oxiana by Robert Byron

The Silk Road: Two Thousand Years in the Heart of Asia by Frances Wood

Hot, Flat and Crowded by Thomas Friedman

Absurdistan by Gary Shteyngart

Taking on the System: Rules for Radical Change in a Digital World by Markos Moulitsas Zuniga

Race Matters by Cornel West

Democracy Matters: Winning the Fight Against Imperialism by Cornel West

Thoughts on 2010, 09, etc...

.


I am very glad 2010 is here. Overall 2009 was a good year. But the last three months ended fairly stressfully. Work issues, church issues and the loss of a loved one made the last 12 weeks of 09 a bit hard. Harder than normal.


So I'm ready for 2010. Some quick hits on the holiday season which were so busy I didn't blog much.

I saw Kimberly fall from a ski lift. Fortunately the lift was only three feet off the ground. Her ski-tips caught the ground at Paoli Peaks in Indiana. She landed face first into the ground below. A cat scan at the ER verified that all was okay. Before the fall the skiing had actually been pretty good.

Jackson got to sled in the snow in Indiana. Click the vid and check out pics on my flickr account.

At a family gathering on New Year's Eve I noticed the theme on Dick Clark's Rockin' Eve was stars who are past their prime and don't know it. Jennifer Lopez looked freakishsly weird, Britney Spears looked hungover and Beyonce looked way out of shape. And I couldn't take my eyes off of Ryan Seacrest's hair...my eyes were oddly hypnotized by his coiff updo.

I have too many gift cards and am overwhelmed on how to spend them. Bought four books today from half-books for $2.00 with a giftcard. Wander aimless around Best Buy and Borders and had book and video overload. I'm not much of a browser. I like to go in and know what I'm looking for.



My Christmas lights did not blow off my roof this year.

Okay gotta go. See ya.

Wiki Map

Here is an interesting map that breaks down which nations have the most wikipedia entries or are tagged the most. I find it fascinating that Burkina Faso leads Africa...more than Egypt or South Africa. That can't be right can it?


Here is the full article on the story...

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/12/07/map-of-wikipedia-articles_n_382404.html

God Bless...

God bless you Grandpa. You are one of my heroes. I will miss you...but we will meet again...

Tebow Fatigue

Tim Tebow does not walk on water.


He might be a great guy and all...but the beatification of Tebow went way to far. Here's a couple of things to keep in mind the next time you hear the FOX or CBS reporters chanting his name in a sutra.

When Sam Bradford won the 2008 Heisman, Tebow could not hide his digust and anger. After the ceremony he even said he would use the slight as motivation against the Sooners in their soon to be played national title tilt. This anger comes despite the fact that Bradford's numbers were much more impressive in every way than Tebow's. Plus, Tebow had already won the award the year before. Revenge? Bitterness? Sense of entitlement? Are these the attributes of a saint?

I know I might cause this blog to come crashing down by saying this but I would rather have Colt McCoy of texas win the Heisman than that poser from Florida.

Then last Saturday night...I caught the last few minutes of Alabama's dismantling of Florida. The cameras caught Tebow crying on the sidelines. Then during his interview he could barely talk because he was crying so much. All this while sporting a Bible verse on his face paint. What a fantastic witness. Way to have your priorities in order Tebow.

This is a guy who has won a Heisman, conference championships and a National Championship. And he's crying because he lost? A bit of perspective please. You've achieved more than the vast majority of college athletes. And you're crying? Can't say I feel sorry for you in the least. Sorry Tebow...your myth has spiraled out of control. Some of it may not be your fault. You're probably not a bad kid. But don't act like you're some sort of saint.

Wonder if someone collected those tears in a vial. Doctors in Gaineville might do tests to see if they have healing properties.

Thanks Sprint...

Last week I excoriated Samsung for their crappy phone and their fraudulent warranty.


So to even the ying yang scales of negative energy I should laud Sprint for trying to rectify the situation.

When Samsung failed to help me I called my provider Sprint to see if they could help me. I knew that if I purchased a new phone I would have to pay the full cost rather than the reduced price one receives for extending a contract or establishing service. I didn't really think that was fair...especially since I have been a loyal Sprint customer for seven years.

Sprint Account Services (not Customer Care Services who couldn't help in the least) said their system would not allow them to simply give me a rebate. But they said I would be eligible for that rebate if I added a third line for $9.99 a month on a two-year contract. Then they would give me a credit of $20 a month for the next two years to cover the cost of that third line and more for the inconvenience I experienced.

The new phone would be programmed with my same number. The old phone will simply go unused since we don't need a third line.

I went to Best Buy since they do not use mail-in rebates on their phones...you get the rebate immediately. I walked out with a free LG Rumor 2. Didn't pay a dime...and when all is said and done I actually got $10 off a month for two years from my what I was originally paying!

So I'm giving Sprint props on this one for helping me out. Still: stay away from Samsung!

The Weez on Jimmy Kimmel Live

Special duet with Sara Bareilles last week....

No Duh? or Free Shoes U?

Rarely do football jobs as big as Notre Dame and Florida State come open at the same time. An interesting question would be if you were a hotshot coach being courted by both and offered the same terms of employment...which job would you take?

Notre Dame used to be the slam dunk answer. But now I'm not so sure. It's cold up in South Bend. Indiana doesn't have as much talent as Florida and you have to compete with Ohio State, Michigan and the rest of the Big Ten for recruits in the upper midwest. Of course Notre Dame can recruit nationally but their academic standards (which I applaud) makes it impossible for some of the best athletes to go there. The NBC contract doesn't mean as much with the spread of satellite and cable outlets. Plus, there's no conference championship to fall back on for a coach. It's BCS or National Title or nothing. That's a lot of pressure.

Florida State does have a lot of recruiting competition with the Gators, Miami and others (UCF, USF, etc...) in Florida. But there are plenty of in-state recruits to go around. Like Notre Dame you do have the chance to restore a program to former glory. Academic standards are less strenuous. The easily dominated ACC is not near the conference the SEC or Big 12 is.

But you know...there's something about Notre Dame. As much as I hate the Fighting Irish...they are something special for whatever reason. If you win big there you would be linked to some of the biggest names in football history. But man, the weather is so much nicer in Tallahassee.

Dunno.

Cup Fever!

I was fortunate that the 2010 World Cup draw was held during my lunch time. I was able to watch the proceedings via the internet. The United States drew their most favorable group in recent memory. The Yanks drew England, Slovenia and Algeria.

England will be tough. Maybe we will pull off another 1950 Cup shocker and beat the Limeys. Slovenia and Algeria barely squeaked into the World Cup. We couldn't ask for a better draw. We avoided a "group of death" and will have little excuse to make it to the second round.

For the uninitiated, there are 32 teams in the World Cup which will be played this summer in South Africa. The 32 teams earned their spots in a rigorous qualifying process in each of the regional federations. The 32 teams were then placed into pots that were determined by FIFA rankings and geography. Then those teams were randomly drawn via lottery balls and placed into eight four team brackets.

The four teams then play each other one time in their respective bracket. If you win you get three points. If you draw you get one point. If you lose you receive zero points. The two teams with the most points after all have played each other then advance to the round of sixteen. Goal differential breaks ties.

From that point on the sixteen teams play in knock out stages similar to the NCAA Basketball Tournament. The field narrows to the quarterfinals (final eight), then the semifinals (final four) then into the championship match.

The farthest the United States has ever advanced is into the quarterfinals in 2002. We shocked Luis Figo (which he deserved for ditching FC Barcelona for Real Madrid) and Portugal in the group stage. We also humiliated our arch-rival Mexico in the Round of Sixteen. We lost to the eventual runner-up in the quarterfinals, Germany, 0-1. We played an amazing match...but German keeper Oliver Kahn (the man with dinner plates for hands) kept our best shots out of the net. Germany would end up losing to a reborn Ronaldo (who sported an awful mohawk while breaking the all-time World Cup Tournament goal record) and Brazil who were trying to make amends for a disastrous 1998 Final loss to France.

In '06 we got shafted by a faux penalty call on Claudio Reyna against Ghana. We didn't make it out of the group stage.

We got a great shot this year. We won last year's World Cup tune up tourney, The Confederation's Cup played in South Africa. We came in second in the Gold Cup a month later losing to Brazil in the final despite leading the entire game until a second half surge by the Brazilians.

People in the U.S. are beginning to take notice. America leads the world in purchasing tickets for the World Cup. Over 70,000 tickets have already been purchased by the Yanks...compared to 25,000 in soccer mad England.

I didn't catch the '06 final live. I had taped it while we were up in Indiana visiting family. I avoided the internet and most news sources. Still...I accidently caught a glimpse of a newspaper headline on the road in Sikeston, Missouri that gave away Italy's shocking victory over the French. I was surprised that the story was on the front page of a local paper and didn't expect to see the ending given away. I watched the game once I got home and still can't believe Zidane headbutted that guy. Of course the French got lucky this year only getting into the World Cup with a blatant hand-ball against Ireland.

It's only December...but things are already gearing up for a great soccer summer!

Boink

Worst Christmas song of all time...

That stupid "boink boink" song by Sir Paul McCartney...I think it's actually called "Wonderful Christmastime." I hate it hate it hate it.

I love the Beatles but their Christmas songs are terrible...

Can't stand "So this is Christmas" by John Lennon. Do the radio stations even listen to the lyrics of this tripe?

Oh and Andy Williams...going down the chimney down is redundant.

I'm not really a Grinch. Just got a stupid cold.

Singing Dynasties

Here's an easy way for my students to learn the basic order of the Chinese ruling dynasties. I have them sing the dynasties to frere jacque. The only danger is during A.P. exam day hearing students softly humming the tune while they take the test.

Xia, Shang, Zhou, Qin (repeat)
Han, Sui, Tang (repeat)
Song, Yuan, Ming, Qing, Republic (repeat)
Communist (repeat).

Yes, I know I leave out the Period of Warring States, Wang Mang's brief rule between the early Han and the later Han and the era of the Three Kingdoms but the basic dynastic structure is there.

Picture: Qin Shihuangdi...The first and only emperor of the Qin Dynasty. China gets its name from this family. He's the guy with all the terra cotta soldiers.

Don't Go Stoops!

C'mon Stoops. The weather in South Bend is awful. Notre Dame is so 1940's. NBC doesn't mean much in the age of satellite t.v. and internet exposure. Plus, half your OU lineup couldn't pass the stringent academic requirements of ND. You'd have to recruit against the Buckeyes and Michigan.

Stay where you're appreciated. Don't listen to a few haters...they're just aggies in disguise trying to sabotage the Sooners.

Don't go Stoops! Don't go!

The truth is....

Oklahoma State will always be just Oklahoma State.

I guess maybe they could change their name to Boone T. Picken's University. Maybe their fortune would change then.

DO NOT BUY A SAMSUNG CELL PHONE!

Do not buy a Samsung cell phone. In fact, I'm going to say that again...

DO NOT BUY A SAMSUNG CELL PHONE!

Just got a new Samsung Rant cell phone six months ago through Sprint via Walmart. Then after only six months...the LCD screen whites out. Can't see anything on the screen. This phone had never been dropped or damaged in anyway...I can honestly say that. Then one day the screen is useless.

Samsung tells me to return it. Then contacts me to say that a new LCD screen is NOT covered in the year warranty and that the charge will be $85.00...for a $29.00 phone. Asinine. So I went up the chain of command to the supervisor who said just the same thing.

I said send the thing back. Don't bother. What a fraudulent warranty. Turns out the screen is what needs to be replaced the most...so they conveniently leave that out of the warranty. First time I've EVER had a problem with a cell phone before the service agreement was up. This phone didn't even last six months. So I'll say it again...

DO NOT BUY A SAMSUNG PHONE!