Dualistic Thinking

God is not a Democrat. God is not a Republican.

Humans are obsessed with dualism. We want to break things down to good versus evil, right and wrong, black and white, us versus them.

I tell my students repeatedly, it's rarely that simple.

For example: Protesters at the University of California are wrong for using violence in their demonstrations. They are violating the very premises of free speech Cal is known for protecting. They definitely should protest. I would have protested if I were there. But violence is unacceptable.

However, that doesn't mean we automatically take sides with the person they are protesting against. The man, who shall not be named here, who was scheduled to speak at their campus is not one you want to be associated with. He is a racist. He is a bigot. He spreads viscous lies. He is a cyber-bully. It takes a lot to be banned from twitter. Twitter allows all kinds of bullying and trolling. This guy was banned from twitter for crying out loud.

Rarely does life come down to saints and sinners. Dualistic thinking is destructive and counter-intuitive.

For example, just because you claim loyalty to a political party or ideology does not mean you should give blind loyalty to that organization or movement.

I cut my ties to the official Republican Party in 1993 because I saw the dangers of feeling like I had to defend my party regardless of their actions. I didn't want to be under the powerful sway of groupthink. So I declared my independence. Since then I have voted for Republicans, Democrats, Libertarians, Greens and Independents. I have ideas that are considered conservative. I also have ideas that some describe as liberal. I am not going to swear allegiance to a label.

Dualistic thinking led many Christians to blindly vote for our current president despite the fact that his proudly stated values often run counter to the Christian faith. As I've said, I could barely stomach the idea of Hillary Clinton as president, but despite her flaws she was far superior to the disaster of Donald Trump from a moral perspective. Every moral failing possessed by Hillary was exaggerated ten-fold by Trump. There was indeed a true lesser of two evils in this election. Trump was not it.

Many Christians voted for Trump due to their long cultivated hatred of Clinton. But I suspect many more voted for Trump simply because he was their party's nominee. This makes me come to the reluctant conclusion that many Republicans would have voted for anyone, anyone simply because they were their party's nominee. Who the nominee is does not matter.

How more distasteful could you be than Trump? He's not a conservative. He never professed to be a Christian until last year when it became politically expedient. Pastors preached sermons against Trump back in the 1990's when he proudly bragged about his marital infidelity and said you shouldn't have to work at marriage. When he said he would only run for president if Oprah was his vice president many conservatives recoiled. Many Christians decried his lack of humanity on his reality show. Ten years ago my conservative friends couldn't stand Trump. What changed their minds? Party loyalty.

Party loyalty or any institutional loyalty is a very dangerous thing. And the Democrats do the same thing although to their credit they've never had a candidate quite as abhorrent to their party values as Trump is to the Republican platform. Free trade? Let's throw that out the window and place taxes and tariffs on Mexican imports. Time and time again Trump violates basic conservative principles and Republicans continue to line up behind him. I don't usually agree with George Will, David Frum, Glenn Beck and Bill Kristol but at least they are standing up for their conservative ideals and are calling Trump out on his scam.

Dualistic thinking is poison.

The other side is not necessarily evil. Rational thinking must be our guide. It's important to weigh the bias inherent in the media and make conclusions based off our observations. I read the Drudge Report and the Huffington Post. I watch Fox News and MSNBC. I read the New York Times and the Washington Times. The truth is usually somewhere in the middle. Party loyalty should never be a part of the criteria. Because parties and institutions often have one major goal above all: to claim power and to maintain power.

1984

"The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command."

 - George Orwell, from his novel 1984

Letter to America

Sufjan Stevens is one of my favorite singer-songwriters. He is a brilliant talent. He's amassed a large following in indie circles.

He's also a professed Christian. The other day he penned a letter to America. Agree or disagree, there are important points for Christians to consider. Here it is...

Everyone Welcome

Happy Groundhog's Day

How I got the Trumpet back

In 2008 I gave up the trumpet. At the age of 35 I was getting braces. I didn't want anything to mess up the process so I gave up one of the things that had really defined who I was...playing the trumpet...particularly playing jazz on trumpet. The whole braces thing lasted a lot longer than expected. I was a unique case. It's also tougher to straighten teeth out as an adult. Two years lingered into three years. Then there were four oral surgeries to go with it.

I had to have implants and bone grafts, the whole works. I had a team working on me. A dentist, an orthodontist, an endodontist and an oral surgeon. My oral surgeon had to invent a new procedure to make my bone graft work. He uses my case at conferences. I'm very thrilled about that. Also thrilled to help pay for several of his ski vacations during those years. Three years merged into four, then five. Finally after five years the whole thing was done.

But I did not pick the trumpet back up for fear of ruining a process that had cost several thousands of dollars. After a year, I decided to give the trumpet a shot. Playing trumpet had given me so much joy over the years. I wanted my son to know me as a trumpet player. He had never heard me play. Guitar yes, trumpet no.

So in July of 2014 I picked up my horn and everything had changed. My chops were out of shape after not playing for six years. My embouchure was completely different after braces and reconstructive surgeries. I said on Facebook that if Chet Baker could re-learn to play after having his teeth knocked out I could re-learn to play. Of course, I'm no Chet Baker, never was, not even close.

I could barely get out a low C. I couldn't even hit the tuning note, the concert B flat. It was super depressing. I tried to play for a few days and then just gave up. I put the strad back on its stand and left it there...

...for another two years.

A couple of weeks ago I decided to give it another shot. Not that I had ever stopped listening to jazz but recently I had been diving back into listening to jazz pretty heavily and all those swinging cats had inspired me. Jazz provides a respite from the stresses of current events. And I wanted to play. But this time I needed a plan.

I lowered my expectations. I restricted myself to the basics. The first few days I would simply try playing long tones. That's it. Five to ten minutes of long tones on low notes. Nothing higher than middle G. And yes, it did sound awful. But after the third day the low notes began to sound reasonable.

After a few days I decided to play the concert B flat scale. Long tones and real slow. One time. Just one scale. Getting to the concert B flat was not easy. But I played that one scale for a week. Five minutes a day. I had already told myself this was going to be a slow process so I was okay with it. I wasn't going to bail.

Within a few days the scale sounded acceptable. And I made it a goal to play the B flat scale ten times each day. I set strict limits. No more, no less than ten runs through this most basic of scales per day. Nothing else.

After a week of that I began playing my old warm up...running through five scales, C-D-E flat-F and G. Man it was rough. Getting to high G was a killer. But I refused to get depressed even though a high G was nothing back in the day. I played them slow for days and then faster and faster.

Baby steps.

My dexterity began to return. My range began to slowly improve. After two weeks of crawling I started to add some of my other old warm up exercises to the mix. And then I felt ready. I had gone to Amazon and ordered the Hal Leonard Ultimate Jazz Fake Book, the book I had used in college when playing with the Earl Enterline Quintet. This book has all the great jazz standards in it with all the chords.

I had already decided which song I would practice. My plan would be to practice this song for a month until I was satisfied I could play it without embarrassment. Not only would I master the melody, I would re-learn all the chords I had forgotten. I actually wrote out all the notes of all the chords so I could eventually start to improvise again.

The song I chose was "Four" by Miles Davis. "Four" is a jazz standard and one I had played quite a bit in college. I chose it because the melody is simple yet the end of the chart does require some dexterity both in valve fingering and embouchure. The chords are accessible but not simplistic. Plus, on the second run through you have the option of taking the chorus up an octave which would provide an additional challenge for me to attack. This seemed like a good song to play.

 "Four"...the first song I had played on trumpet in eight years. Here's Miles and Coltrane playing it...



Three days and it's proceeding slowly but nicely. I've got the chorus down. The close can still snag me a bit on occasion. The upper octave still doesn't sound as clear as I would like. And I haven't even started trying to improvise with the chords yet. I figure in a couple of weeks or so I'll put it on the stereo and try to play along. I'm taking this nice and easy so I don't freak out and bail again.

I can't tell you how much happiness this has brought me. Just playing a song has been cathartic. Getting back into a chorus has been a sweet release. Geez, I needed this. I didn't realize how much a void there was without playing jazz. Words can't express it.

I have many many months, perhaps years to go before I feel good about even getting close to playing trumpet in public again. And I was never that great of a player to begin with. But I had forgotten what the sheer joy of being lost in a jazz classic felt like. Once I have "Four" down, memorized, and improvised I'll move on to some other classics that will help me progress in various ways. "Friday the 13th" and "Well You Needn't" by Thelonious Monk are definitely on the list for their dexterity. "Polka Dots and Moonbeams" will be a nice easy ballad to work on tonality. "Cherokee" for the challenging chords. I'm in this for the long term.

My goal: to play trumpet with my son playing on piano. That would be sweet.

Exploding Lights

Hargrove, man. Roy Hargrove.

He came exploding into the jazz world back in the nineties. He was one of the Young Lions of the nineties jazz renaissance. One of the brightest trumpet lights of the day. Genius. The story goes that he was discovered by Wynton Marsalis at Booker T. Washington School for the Performing Arts in Dallas, Texas.

His solos possessed fire. He wrote layered works and put together big bands and quintets. He played bop, mambo, r&b and soul. He was rolling. He won grammys and I got a video cassette recording of him playing with Dave Brubeck, Joshua Redman, and Christian McBride at the Grammy Ceremonies in 1993...and I just found a youtube clip of that performance...guess there's others out there who were recording that night!

Then I lost track of him. The 'aughts came and I got busy and Hargrove fell off my map. I still listened to his old stuff but I didn't even know if he was still around.

He's still around but he's had a rough road. A couple of years ago he got busted for possession. He's had to cancel shows for health  reasons. I follow the guy on Facebook and Instagram and he looks a shell of himself. I mean we all look older but it looks like he's had a tough go of it. His music still sounds good and I hope he's getting better. I hope he's getting things back on track. He hasn't released a recording since 2009. He's still touring and I hope he finds or has found his way back from the abyss.

I iTuned two of his albums this week. Earfood...a small group set and Emergence, featuring his big band. Both cuts demonstrate his talent. Emergence blows me away. The chords and the choruses are so thick with power and might.

I hope he can release more to the world. The world can use some bright creativity right now.

Songs of Mirth and Melancholy are what we need.

Listening to jazz almost every day. I think jazz will help me get through the darkness of the current regime. I hope that's the case.

I did discover an album this past week that's kinda jazz kinda not. Whatever it is, it's sublime. Just two guys. Branford Marsalis on tenor and soprano sax. Joey Calderazzo on piano. Sax and piano.   That's it. No rhythm section. Some of it is almost classical. It's mind-blowing.

Songs of Mirth and Melancholy is the album. 2011 on the Marsalis Music label.

You can hear the whole album here. I listened to it there. Then I went to iTunes and bought it. It will help ease your stress.

Confession

From page 12 of the United Methodist Hymnal. Read today during communion at our church. 

Kansas Day

Happy Kansas Day!

Refugees

Photo: Aylan Kurdi. Three years old. Drowned while trying to escape from Syria to Europe with his family. 

"For I was hungry and you fed me. I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink. I was a stranger and you invited me in."  - Matthew 23:35

"It's hypocrisy to call yourself a Christian and chase away a refugee or someone seeking help, someone who is hungry or thirsty, toss out someone who is in need of my help. If I say I am a Christian, but do these things, I am a hypocrite." - Pope Francis

we the people

MAGA

Apparently Trump's Make America Great Again merch is made in China. 

Alternative Facts

"The Trump Administration would like to congratulate the Kansas City Chiefs and the Dallas Cowboys for making this year's Superbowl. This will be the greatest Superbowl ever. Period."

#alternativefacts

America First?

"And on this platform, folks, those most perplexing people...the Lads with the Siamese Beard! Unrelated by blood, they are joined in a manner that mystifies the mightest minds in the land!"

- Dr. Seuss

Do not go gentle into that good night

By Dylan Thomas

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.

Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Resistance

Be Present

Some politicians are boycotting today's inauguration. I completely understand why. However, I believe that hiding is the wrong course of action.

Many of those boycotting the inauguration are heroes of mine. They have faced evil head on in the past and prevailed. Many of them have suffered great personal and physical cost for standing up to evil. Many have endured much greater sacrifices than I ever have.

But I believe that if it is part of the democratic norm for the opposition party to attend an inauguration, then you must attend. You cannot cede the stage. You must be present.

If your opponent is going to cheat you, make them cheat you to your face.

I did not like the results of the election. I am concerned about Russian involvement with the election. But I have not heard evidence of actual tampering of the results. The unfortunate truth is that this election is legitimate based on the current rules of the game.

Yes, the Electoral College is antiquated and makes a mockery of the "one man, one vote" concept. Yes, the Electoral College disenfranchises millions based on its winner take all results. Yes, the Electoral College is a 200 year hold-over from the fear white, land-owning elites had of the masses voting and later a fear of freed slaves utilizing their right to vote. Yes, the Electoral College should be abolished or greatly altered.

However, the rules of the game were established and agreed upon. The future of the Electoral College should be debated. But it is my opinion that as abhorrent as this past election was, it is legitimate until proven otherwise. And the opposition party has a duty to be present. The opposition party must be a part of the democratic process so it can help guide policy.

Now, more than ever, is not a time to hide.

Good Bye, with Respect.

I voted for Barack Obama twice. I didn't always agree with him. But he held the office with respect and honor. There was not an Oval Office scandal during his time in office. He treated others with grace and dignity. He developed a cordial relationship with the Republican Speaker of the House. He created an imperfect healthcare system that yet allowed my father to have healthcare during his battle with cancer. My mother, now a widow, is not hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt due to his cancer treatments because of Obamacare. And she and my disabled sister have affordable healthcare. That would be enough for me to be thankful for President Obama.

I feel that all that is about to change tomorrow. Dignity, respect and basic competence may be hard to find in the next four years. Conflicts of interest, scandal and rudeness, I fear, will be the new norm in the White House...although the new president apparently will live much of the time in a self-named tower in New York.

So I offer the Obama Family a heartfelt thanks and goodbye. You will be missed. Thank you for your service.

Everyday

This is a list of things I try to do every day. I don't always get around to doing them all. But when I do, I know it's been a very nice day.

Pray/Meditate
Read the Bible
Kiss my Wife
Hug my Son
Drink Green Tea
Write in Moleskine
Read book/magazine
Blog
Five Minute Spanish Lesson on Duolingo
Exercise
Practice trumpet/guitar

Back on the Scene

Saw the movie La La Land a few weeks back. Although I usually don't go for musicals, I really liked it. One of the reasons I liked it is because it brought Jazz back into the mainstream consciousness, at least for a few months. It showed the problem of how there are few venues left where you can find and enjoy true classic jazz. 

So I was happy to read today that one of the legendary old jazz clubs in New York is re-opening for business later this year. Minton's in Harlem was was one of the great spots to hear some of the legends of be-bop and hard bop back in the day. Some say be-bop was invented there. Everybody played there. Monk, Diz, Bird, Charlie Christian, Duke, Louis, Ella, Billie, Benny, The Hawk, Prez, Ben Webster, Sarah Vaughan, Eck, Erroll, Krupa, Miles, Art (Tatum and Blakey) and tons more jammed there. The pic above shows Thelonious Monk, Howard McGhee, Roy Eldridge and Teddy Hill hanging out in front of Minton's in 1947. Now, seventy years later, the place will hop again. 

Anytime a jazz joint opens, that's reason to celebrate...but especially when a legendary place like Minton's comes back on the scene. 

MLK

New Room

Well, admittedly, I haven't gotten used to my new classroom. After sixteen years in one room I knew any change to a new room would not be easy. But, I'm reluctant to get too attached since I'm only in this particular room for one calendar year. The plan is to move upstairs next January.

The new rooms are a bit too sterile for me. White walls, white tile floor, white boards. I'm sure it will grow on me, but I sure do miss my carpet. Once I get into my permanent room I'll have to invest in an area rug.

To make matters worse they weren't done with this building. They were supposed to be. But they are still drilling, hammering and making lots of noise as they continue to work on this wing. We shouldn't have moved this early. We should have waited until summer. Would have been better for teachers and students. I was breathing in dust the first few days. Now, instead of being next to a construction zone, we are actually in the construction zone.

We knew construction would continue next to us as they demolished my old wing and built a anew. But to not even be done with the building we now inhabit...unacceptable. This isn't hindsight. Teachers were expressing these concerns months ago. But we kept hearing the same promise...

"It will be finished." "Oh yeah, it will be done on time."

Nope. Not even a little bit.

They are still not done or even close to being done with this building.

I guess I shouldn't complain too much. I don't have to float between rooms like some. My current room has been functional. My technology has worked for the most part. It will get better.

However,

I still miss the old place.

The New Year

Well, It's January 11th. Guess I should get to blogging again. I took a bit of rest from the tech grind. Now back at it. 

The Holidays went very well. Enjoyed seeing family. Had a tire blowout right outside of St. Louis on our way to Indiana. Fortunately it blew right by an exit with a gas station and I was able to change to a temp donut in a safe area. It was 6 pm, the day after Christmas, yet we were able to find an open tire place and replace our tires. Only delayed our trip three hours. Not bad when we realize it could have been much much worse. 

We enjoyed our visits in Tulsa and Southern Indiana. Life has resumed its busy-ness with a new kitchen renovation, moving to a new classroom in a new high school building and my son's birthday last week. I'll revisit these fun times down the road. It seems now the Holidays are almost a distant memory at this point. 

Christmas Eve

Christmas Acolyte

Done

Well, it's done. Last night I fulfilled the final requirement for my Masters Degree. I presented my final project at the SMU Capstone Forum. Students in the Graduate Program for the Liberal Arts are required to attend the forum and present their final projects. I brought Kim and Jackson along for this last jaunt in the process. 

My project took me down an unexpected path. As a history teacher I expected to write a research thesis. I had many ideas in mind. However, one of my creative writing projects caught the attention of my Academic Advisor. He thought I had the beginnings of a novel in one of my short stories. So I went with it and the process kind of snowballed until a novel began to take shape. It was going so good that I decided to submit it as my Capstone Project. 

I owe a great deal of thanks to Dr. Gary Swaim for his great advice and encouragement. He was a great help to me. He is a legend in the Dallas literary community. My novel is a satirical road novel that details the changes in social dynamics that occurred in the mid-1990's with the advent of the internet, right before social media and smart phones ruined everything. It's filled with existential angst, self-loathing and unresolved narratives: basically all your garden variety cliches of Generation X fiction. 

After the forum, my wife and son walked around the campus to look at the Christmas lights. Above is Dallas Hall, the oldest building on campus and where I had many of my classes. I will miss coming to The Hilltop every week. Southern Methodist University was a great place to learn and I met a lot of great people over the years.

So, I still have a lot of work to do. I have a lot of revisions and editing yet to do before I submit it for publication. But that's the goal, publication with a real publishing house. And I'm in no hurry. I want to get this right.

Next comes graduation. I could have walked this Saturday but there's too much going on with the Holiday Season. I decided awhile ago to attend the May ceremonies. That's when I'll get my diploma. It's been a fun ride.

A Master of Liberal Studies in the Humanities. 

Packing Up

For the past sixteen years, this (above) was my view as I looked out from my lectern at my classroom. This week I started packing it up. I have to have it all packed up by Friday, December 16th. Over Christmas Break, movers will take my stuff to my new room in the new building. I will be allowed to say good-bye to the room and give it the once-over on January 3rd. Then it gets roped off and becomes a demolition zone. 

This (above) was the view as you walked into my room. I'd feel a whole lot better if I was actually moving into my permanent room. But the room I'm moving to is only my temporary home. I'll be in a first floor corner room for two semesters. Then, next December (2017), I'll have to pack it all up and move to what will be my final stop on the second floor. 

So I won't be decorating the first next room very much. I'm going to keep it all pretty simple since I'll have to pack it up in a calendar year anyway. 

Here's the direct view (above) as you walked into my room. My Grandfather White made that lattice divider, one of the last things he made before his sight gave out. 

This is a view of my work space. My little office area back there in the corner. This room was very comfortable and was a second home. I'm going to miss it. The new room, both of them, will be corner rooms with four windows. I will be giving up some space and I'm losing carpet. But they will be very nice and decked out with a 70 inch monitor screen. The new wing will be great and when I move to my final room I'll have great views. But I will miss the old Temple of Doom a lot. It was a good home. 

Dolly

Saturday night we went to see Dolly Parton in Grand Prairie. I've never been a big Dolly fan, but my wife grew up loving her music. My wife, fearful that Dolly's touring days may not be long being that she's now 70 years old, wanted to go. So we bought tix and admittedly I was kind of meh about going. But man oh man I left that show extremely impressed.

Dolly Parton's talent is often overshadowed by her big hair, plastic surgery and out-sized personality. But her musicianship was on full display Saturday. She played guitar (both acoustic and electric), banjo, dulcimer, mountain flute, autoharp, harmonica and even the saxophone during her two hour set. Her songwriting skills have never been in question. Her connection to the audience is hard to fabricate. You can't conjure up charisma. She connects naturally and effortlessly. She's a showman (show woman?) in the truest since of the word. Saturday, she put on a show for the ages. 

Dolly is one of America's greatest entertainment icons. I've been thinking of who else would fit on that list, American entertainment icons who span decades, changed their art form, performed across many mediums and had success across genres.

Here's a few I'd put on the list along with Dolly Parton...

Elvis Presley

Will Rogers

Louis Armstrong

Frank Sinatra

Bing Crosby

These guys were big in music or movies or TV. Will Rogers even had a column in the New York Times. We need some more women on that list. 

I've had trouble coming up with other American artists so iconic over a long period of time. Willie Nelson is close and maybe Johnny Cash. If the Beatles were American, they'd be on the list. Charlie Chaplin comes close but he seems too pinned into one medium. There's been big stars who've had huge influence. But many of them are focused in one art form. Many of them are tied to only one era. It's a fun question to think about. I know I'm probably leaving off some big time names that are pretty obvious. 

Dolly definitely belongs on that list even if her music is not necessarily the music I listen to a lot. I like her stripped down blue grass the most. But on Saturday night, we were all moving to everything she did on stage. I've been to a lot of great concerts...but that was a transcendent experience. 

New Digs

So a friend of mine in the District Administration was able to swing a private tour of the new high school currently under construction. We will be moving into my wing this January. But the room I'll be moving in January will only be my room for a calendar year. Once they get the elevators operational I'll be moving to the second floor to what should be my permanent home. Seriously, there is a chance that room could be the last classroom I ever have. There's a good possibility I'll retire in that room. I only have ten years left if I retire when eligible. The rooms are a little smaller than what I've been in for the past sixteen years. And they won't have carpet. I may have to add some cheap Persian looking rugs...but not until I move into my permanent space.

Below, will be my view once I move upstairs in January 2018. Staff parking will be directly below so I'll be able to keep an eye on my truck. This corner room has four windows and very nice views. This January I will be moving into a first floor corner room. It will be nice, as well, with four windows. But I'd rather be upstairs. It will be chaotic. They are giving us one day to move. January 3rd. We're not allowed until then. Students come back January 4th. May be quite a scramble. And that's if they actually get it done in time!

Cobras

My Dad's favorite car was the 427 AC Cobra. Whenever we see one, my son and I try to take a picture next to it if possible, to honor his memory. Sunday we stumbled upon two (the other one is in the background to the right) at the annual Turkey Trax Auto Show right around the corner from our house at the local park. These were the real deal, no kits. 

Dad always loved auto shows and particularly Cobras and Mustangs. They had at least twenty Mustangs. This is the 1968 390 Mustang GT fastback in Highland Green...the kind driven by Steve McQueen in the classic movie Bullitt. Kinda cool to be able to just walk a few minutes from our house and see so many great cars. Dad would have loved it. We've been going to this show for several years since its so close by. Now it means even more. 

I'm For Them, I'm With Them

                                         

After Brexit there was a rise in hate crimes against ethnic minorities in Great Britain. There were many dimensions to the Brexit vote but fear of mass immigration seemed to dominate many of the reasons why British citizens voted to leave the European Union.

To show support for the many ethnic groups under attack in the days following the Brexit vote, many citizens began wearing safety pins to show others that they were against this type of racist behavior and that they were a safe person for those needing support in tumultuous times.

After the election of Trump, the safety pin movement quickly migrated to America. Many Americans began wearing the safety pin to demonstrate their support for those mocked, ridiculed and threatened by the Trump campaign. The safety pin showed that the wearer was a person of safety. It is a symbol meant to instill confidence in those threatened that not everyone feels the same way as Trump and his supporters.

Of course, detractors say it's a useless symbol and worry that it gives the wearer a free pass thinking they're doing their part in fighting racism and bigotry. They believe that action is needed, not symbols.

But I believe symbols are important. Of course action must accompany symbols or they lose their power. But I work and teach with a lot of people who feel threatened by Trump's rhetoric. They are worried, legitimately worried about their place in Trump's America.

So I will be wearing a safety pin. I want my students to know that I am a safe person. I want them to know my classroom is a sanctuary. I want them to know that the main reason I'm in this classroom is for them. I'm for them. I'm with them.

Results

The past two days I've heard, seen and read a lot of entitled white folks telling people to shut up and accept the results of the election.

That's fine sentiment coming from a position of power. That's fine talk when you are white. As a white male I know full well the power of white privilege in this country. Don't pretend it doesn't exists.

Ever wonder why I've never been stopped by the wal-mart "guard" as I exit the store, when I see them stopping the African-American family or the Hispanic family right before or after me? Or when I've been given a free pass on a traffic violation when my African-American friend gets a ticket BY THE SAME COP for the same violation? Or when a Chick-Fil-A manager gets on to my African-American friend's son in the playground when it was actually a white kid bullying others? I could go on and on. These are events I have seen with my own eyes.

You won, white America. Now, stop talking for a moment. Stop trying to educate. Stop trying to explain yourself for a moment. Stop score boarding. For a moment, just a moment...listen. Be gracious for a moment.

I'm against violence. And I believe in respect. But I also believe people have the right to peacefully express their opinion without being told to quiet down. Peaceful protests enact serious change. Whether or not you liked Hillary, the fact remains a racist demagogue was just elected as President. Whether or not you feel he was the better option, it still doesn't change the fact that he has offended everyone from Muslims to the Handicapped. My sister is handicapped so I sometimes take these things personally.

Try telling the the Hispanic girl in my class who is crying because she's sincerely afraid of being deported because Trump threatened to rescind an executive order that gave her the right to be here, why she is wrong.

Try telling a young girl that the man who said horrible things about enjoying assaulting women, why it was okay to vote for him.

Try telling the Muslim girl, who was elected Homecoming Queen this year at my High School (in Texas no less!), why she shouldn't be afraid of a man who threatened to ban Muslims from the U.S.. By the way, he made that ban statement while she was out of the country for a week to attend her sister's wedding in Pakistan. She would not have been allowed to return to the country or my school if his ban had actually existed.

They can say they voted for economic reasons or pro-life reasons or whatever. They can say they voted because one candidate was corrupt. But the fact remains that when the Ku Klux Klan celebrates the victory of a candidate, we should all be ashamed.

Get out of your white suburb and your white social circle and your white family for a moment. Get out to the real world. Talk to my students who are scared. And tell them again why you voted the way you did.

Don't tell them to quiet down in the white paternalistic tone so prevalent in our culture.

Console them. Perhaps even apologize. You can lecture on social media or in letters to the editor. But look at my students in the eye and explain to them why you voted for Trump.

And you better hope they show greater respect and cooperation Obama was shown the past eight years.

Resolved

I must admit there have been times in recent years when I have been tempted to move to another high school to teach. Most of these other high schools that caught my eye have been schools with wealthy populations. And overwhelmingly white.

I admit that working in a diverse Title One District, that I have to drive 25 minutes to get to, has sometimes beaten me down. The challenge to teach students from difficult backgrounds can often be daunting, even after eighteen years. I have been discouraged to see some of my colleagues at wealthier districts having comparatively easier times coaching their students to excellent AP Exam or SAT scores. I have been temped to leave many times for greener environs.

And I did leave once. Ten years ago I left my school and taught for a year at the wealthiest public school in Texas. It was a good year. My fellow staff members were fantastic. My students much easier to teach in many regards. Getting high test scores was a breeze. But I was missing something not working with under-privileged kids. And the next year I returned back to the school where I had begun my career and where I teach today.

But even in the last decade since I returned I admit growing weary at the challenge of teaching dis-advantaged students. It's hard.

But yesterday's election results re-awakened me. Yesterday, my Hispanic, Islamic and African-American students had a look of fear and disappointment in their eyes. America had picked a man who had openly and regularly insulted their race or religion. This man had threatened to deport them, their families and friends. This man had suggested implementing a ban on allowing people of their religion to enter the country. This man had joked about sexually assaulting women.

One may have disagreed with Hillary's political positions and voted for that reason alone. But this action also showed support for a man who to many of my students poses an existential threat. Voting against Hillary was a vote for man endorsed by the Ku Klux Klan...a terrorist group. You may have disagreed with Hillary, like I do on many issues, but voting for her probably did not pose a threat to your existence, your race or your religion.

Honestly, as a middle class white male, Trump's election will probably not effect my daily life too much. That's an unfortunate truth in a nation where white males to a great degree still have undeserved privilege compared to other ethnicities. But to many of my friends and students, their way of life may be in danger.

They need support. They need defenders. They need someone on their side. So yesterday, after getting past the initial and overwhelming disappointment, after getting over my anger and disgust with my fellow Americans and fellow "Christians" who voted for Donald Trump, I became resolved that I'm exactly where God wants me to be.

I am going to redouble my efforts to teach tolerance, respect and empathy for other cultures in my World History classes. I'm going to provide a safe sanctuary for my minority students. I am going to let them know that there are people here who will fight for them and defend them and stand with them. I am going to do my best to educate the poor whites in my school who so often fall prey to patterns of racist and bigoted behavior because they are feeling increasingly isolated.

I got into this profession to educate and empower. And I am privileged to be in a position to help those who need it the most. I will love them and fight for them and give them the strength and tools to reach their full potential in this life.

I'm not going anywhere.

no words

Today I am ashamed.

Hillary was a obviously a flawed candidate. But to vote for xenophobia, racism, sexism, adultery, tax evasion and bullying?

As Glenn Beck said last night on NBC: "If this is what it means to be a Conservative or a Republican, I'm not sure I want to be either of those things any more."

Glenn Beck (!) said that.

I want all my Hispanic, Muslim, African-American, Handicapped, Immigrant and Female friends to know that even if my country doesn't stand beside you, I, for one, will. I will fight for you. I will stand alongside you.

Well, Wow...

That was epic. Ten innings. A rain delay. Game tying home runs. Worn out pitchers. Close outs. Weird two strike bunt attempts. Game winning hits. Man, I'm tired this morning. That was a late game. Well worth staying up for. After I did finally get to sleep the power went off around 3 am due to a passing storm which woke me up. So I'm pretty groggy today. But that was a sight: The Chicago Cubs won the World Series.

My Dad must be up to something up there in Heaven. One month after he passes away the team he adopted as an adult, the Royals, win the title. A year later, the team he rooted for as a kid and teenager win their first title since the days of the Ottoman Empire. I wish he could have seen all this. 

Glad the Cubs won but I do feel for Cleveland fans. I believe they're cursed by the Chief Wahoo logo. They drop Chief Wahoo and they win a series. 

Happy to see Ben Zobrist win the Series MVP. He was an integral part of the Royals World Series run last year. He even named his baby daughter born after the 2015 series, Royal. But he moves on to Chi in Free Agency and helps the Cubs do the impossible. He's also an alum of Olivet Nazarene University. Good guy and good ballplayer. 

Only bad thing is that, like the Red Sox, the Cubs become just another team. No more curses. No more lovable losers. They are now just another big market team that has a lot of money to spend. Soon they'll be another evil empire. I mean I hope not...but that's the way these things often go. Amazing to think that Seattle hasn't even been to a World Series. The Nationals are still a young franchise so not surprising they haven't made it yet. And you've got the Rangers and Astros who haven't won the whole thing yet despite three appearance between the two. 

But man, the Tribe. Tough day. 

I did enjoy the throwback Harry Carey commercial at the end of the Series. Well played. Cubs Win! Cubs Win!

One Last Time...

Well, this is it. In about ten hours (from the time I'm writing this) I won't be able to say this so I'm going to say it one last time. Then I'll shut up about it until November 2017 when hopefully I'll be able to say it again...

The Kansas City Royals are the World Champions.

For about ten more hours.

I'm not really emotionally involved in this year's World Series. I'm glad to see two long suffering franchises getting a shot.

I'm going for the Cubs simply because that was the team my Dad rooted for as a kid growing up in Gary, Indiana. One of his uncles took him to Cubs games. Another one of his uncles hated the Cubs and took him to old Comiskey to see the White Sox. But my Dad always rooted for the Cubs although he always had a special fondness in his heart for the Sox. Nellie Fox, after all, was one of his all time favorite players. So was Ernie Banks. Dad had a signed photo of Ernie Banks hanging up in his home office. It's still hanging up there. In fact, it hangs next to a painting of the Cubs logo I made for him in high school art class.

My routine after school in my high school years was to come home, turn on WGN and watch Harry Carey and Steve Stone broadcast Cubs games. I would do my homework while watching the last few innings of Cubs baseball. I liked the Cubs and always hoped they'd win. But my heart was always with the Royals. Still, if I had a National League team to root for, it was the Cubbies. My senior year I had the privilege of attending a game at Wrigley with two of my best friends. It was a fantastic experience. Wrigley is a beautiful ballpark. This was in 1990 and we even got to see Harry Carey lead "Take Me Out to the Ballgame" during the seventh inning stretch. I even wore a Cubs hat from time to time.

The only thing that keeps me from really getting into this series is the sheer number of bandwagon Cubs fans. So ridiculous. Also, Chicago is a huge market and the Cubs have the highest payroll in baseball. It's hard for me to root for a big market team with huge monetary advantages over the majority of the league. The Cubs are in danger of simply becoming a mid-western version of the Yankees. It was easier for me to like them when they were lovable losers.

So yeah, I'm leaning Cubs...with my history I should probably be even more engaged. But I won't feel too badly if Cleveland takes it all tonight. Their fanbase has been through it as well. I'm glad it's gone to seven games. Gonna be epic.

A New Prairie Home Companion

I didn't make much time over the last couple of decades to watch Prairie Home Companion with Garrison Keillor. It was hard to find the time to dedicate two hours to a radio variety program every Saturday night. I would catch it here and there, usually while traveling on the road. Still, it gave me comfort that this show was on the air. I remember as a kid listening to it off and on. As a kid I didn't get it. I didn't get the humor or appreciate the music. As I grew up I gained an appreciation for bluegrass and roots music. And I began to catch the wry subtlety of Keillor's dispatches from Lake Wobegon.

Even though I didn't get to listen to it much it still gave me nostalgic comfort that there was still a place on the radio that every Saturday people could listen to homespun humor and Americana music.

Well, Keillor finally hung it up. He retired after over four decades as the founder, director and host of the show. And surprisingly he turned over the reins to one of my musical heroes, Chris Thile. I've been listening to Chris Thile for over ten years ever since I first saw him on Austin City Limits. He and his group, Nickel Creek, blew me away. Then he later formed the amazing band, Punch Brothers. He is a virtuoso on mandolin, a great singer and composer. He even once received the MacArthur Genius Grant.

Thile took over this past week as the new permanent host of Prairie Home Companion. I didn't actually listen to it on the radio. I watched it. I live streamed it on my TV via YouTube Saturday night. It was a fantastic debut show. Great guests like another of my heroes, Jack White and the band Lake Street Dive. Thile's monologue was spot on and the radio bits were good. The show is going to focus more on music, which is fine by me.

I may not always have two hours each Saturday night to give it a listen or a watch. But I'm going to give it a shot. The show is a relaxing way to end the week. It takes me back to a slower, more relaxed time which may or may not have actually existed. But it's nice to think there was such a time.

Methodists

So Sunday we became Methodists. Officially.

This wasn't as easy as it sounds. Kimberly and I both grew up in the Nazarene denomination. We met at a Nazarene university. Without the Nazarenes I would not have met my wife. My son would not be here. My Dad was a Nazarene pastor. It's the only denomination each of us has ever known. And it's a great denomination.

Guess the tribalism instinct is a powerful force.

Yes the Nazarene church has its issues. Too many in the denomination are too cozy with one particular political party. There has been some political mis-management which almost led to the dissolution of the Nazarene Publishing House. There's the usual petty turf wars and policy battles. You find these in all denominations. I am aware of the serious issues within the Methodist denomination. These issues were not why we left.

We love the Nazarene Church.

But today we officially entered into membership with Heath First United Methodist Church. We are excited about this new journey. We started attending Heath UMC this past January. We quickly felt welcomed. The music is great. Our Pastor is a fantastic guy. He's an inspiring speaker and has a real vision for what this church can do in Heath and the surrounding area. The congregation has been wonderful to us. It's not a big church, but it has a big mission. The neighborhoods around the church are exploding in growth and there are great spiritual needs to be met.

So yeah, I'm excited.

But also a little sad. We didn't split from the Nazarenes. There was no doctrinal dispute or political issue that drove us away. We just could no longer attend the church where my Dad had pastored the last twelve years of his life any longer. It was too difficult and sad. His memory was everywhere. We needed a fresh start. And the other closest Nazarene church, where Kim grew up, where we got married, was also a part of our past. We really didn't feel moved to return there.

We really didn't know what to do. Doctrinally we knew we were pretty much on the same page as the United Methodist Church. I have a strong Methodist heritage on my maternal side of the family. But still, it's a strange thing to leave something you've known for so long...your entire life. But God led us to this little church. This little church that's going to grow. This church has already helped us immensely. They don't even realize how much they've helped us heal after a difficult season.

So we're Methodists. It's just a name really. We are followers of Christ. And as our pastor says, we are sowing the seeds for a great awakening.

18th and Vine

I moved to Dallas, Texas nearly twenty years ago. And I have been searching for barbecue as good as my hometown Kansas City ever since. As much as I searched I could never find anything that was close to Kansas City BBQ. And I was a bit surprised. Texas is proud of their barbecue. There are some good places. I went to dives all over DFW and North Texas. But I could not find one that just hit the right spot. Until now.

Last year I heard about some Kansas City natives who had set up a BBQ catering business and hoped to soon open up a KC style BBQ place. Soon, a few months later, 18th and Vine BBQ opened up on Maple Street near the hospital district. In Kansas City, 18th and Vine is where you find Arthur Bryant's BBQ...the godfather joint of Kansas City style barbecue. 18th and Vine was also where the great jazz clubs were in the 1930's.

About a week ago we went and finally checked it out. And it was amazing. Just like home. I had ribs and my wife had pulled pork. They were most excellent. The place has photos of famous KC jazz musicians on the walls and even Charlie Parker on the kid's menu. It's a perfect place for KC expats to hang out.

The opening of this place has made me so happy! Finally, after all these years, I can have true KC style BBQ in the town where I live. Upstairs they have a music venue called The Roost where they feature live jazz. I hope to check out The Roost very soon.

Of course the place has burnt ends. Fantastic burnt ends.

Claiborne at White Rock

I had the privilege last week to see one of my favorite authors speak in Dallas. Shane Claiborne is a writer, Christian activist and one of the founders of the New Monastic movement. He spoke at White Rock United Methodist about his new book Executing Grace. 

Executing Grace takes on the issue of capital punishment from a Christian perspective. After a 30 minute talk, a panel discussion was conducted to discuss the death penalty. 

I left inspired. The refreshing thing about Claiborne has always been the fact that he walks the walk. He lives his message in the real world. His life is the anti-thesis of the ivory tower. 

That night I picked up his new book, Executing Grace. The first few chapters have been excellent. Claiborne always motivates me to put the book down and live the truth I'm reading. 

End of an Amazing Run

It was bittersweet last night hearing the Royals had been eliminated from playing in the post-season. 

It's been an amazing run. Two World Series appearances and a World Championship. After years of futility it was thrilling to see the Royals make it back to the top of the baseball world. 

But I was a little sad because the Kansas City Royals helped serve as a nice distraction during a really hard time. My Dad was also a Royals fan. It was something we shared. He saw their run to the 2014 pennant. He passed away a month before they won the 2015 Championship. 

My son and I drove up to Kansas City to attend Game Two. The Royals won 7-1. It was the last home game of the season since KC would win the title on the road in New York. 

That was the trip of a lifetime. My son had never been to my hometown before. He saw my old house, school and got to tour my old church. He had KC BBQ for the first time at my Dad's favorite BBQ joint, Johnny's. My son saw his first game at Kauffman Stadium. And it was the World Series!

My Dad was in our thoughts the whole time. That trip helped begin the healing process during an extraordinarily rough time. Amazing how a dumb game can really bring healing to a hurting soul. 

Well, the Royals just had some bad luck this year. Injuries and one bad month. And they still almost made it back. Next year, they'll have the same core that won a series. They'll give it a good run. They will be back. 

The Historical Record

I have been holding back. I really don't like getting political on this blog. But this is a strange presidential election. And I want to go on record. I want the historical record clear on where I stood on the 2016 presidential election. I want there to be no doubt. In ten or twenty years, when my son asks me who I voted for, I will not be embarrassed by my vote.

There is no way I could ever in a million years ever vote for Donald Trump.

He is not a real Republican. He is not a true conservative. He is destroying the party of my Dad.

He is a racist, misogynist bigot.

He is a terrible businessman who has declared bankruptcy six times. More of his business ventures have failed than succeeded. He inherited $250 million from his father. He earned nothing on his own. If he had put that inheritance in a simple index fund he would be worth $12 billion today...without lifting a finger. But Forbes has placed his worth at $4 billion. And that is funny money. He's actually in great debt. He can't even pay his campaign staff. He is a horrible con artist of a businessman. He ruins lives. He doesn't pay his bills.

He has been married three times. He is a notorious philanderer and womanizer. All these things are well documented. He even proudly admits to his indiscretions.

His policies are ridiculous. A wall? He's going to make Mexico pay for it? That stupid idea alone should be enough disqualify him from office.

He is a hypocrite. Make America Great Again? Bring jobs back? I actually own two neckties and a dress shirt made with the Donald J. Trump label. The two ties were made in Vietnam. The shirt...China. 

He will soon be under indictment for bribery in Florida for trying to pay off Florida's Attorney General.

Why won't he release his tax returns? Because it will show how little he has given to charity and how little he is actually worth. It will also probably show his business dealings with Putin's Russia. 

He lies and lies. When confronted with his lies he double-downs on his lies. He has no shame. He just doesn't care.

He is the most prominent of the birthers, one of the dumbest conspiracy theories in history.

He became pro-life only a few years ago for political expediency.

I could go on and on and on. Any decent human being, especially those who call themselves Christian, should stand up against such a brazenly racist candidate.

I know you may not like Hillary. I'm not a huge fan either. I don't agree with much of her world view. Honestly, this is not an endorsement of Hillary. But the truth is, she is the most scrutinized woman in the history of the United States. The Republicans have paid the best lawyers and investigators in the world to find dirt on her...and they have found nothing of substance beyond mere conspiracy theories. They even had a special prosecutor who's sole job was to find dirt on the Clintons. Kenneth Starr and his full time staff could not find anything on Hillary, not regarding Whitewater or anything. They had to fall back on the President lying about marital infidelities in the White House.

The private email server scandal is a joke. Colin Powell used a private server. Condeleeza Rice had one. This is a manufactured scandal.

Benghazi? The House Republicans have held six hearings and sent out dozens of investigators to find dirt. And they have found nothing. Nothing! A waste of taxpayer money.

The fact is, after twenty years and millions spent in trying to find skeletons, nothing substantial has been found. She may be shady...but she is no shadier than any other major political figure in Washington. She would not be my first choice. But I'm not going to waste my vote on a third-party candidate like I did with Ralph Nader, who I respect immensely.

The stakes are too high. Hillary may be an imperfect candidate, who is perfect? But she will be competent in the job. She has the respect of world leaders. She has the respect of anyone who has worked closely with her, Republicans and Democrats.

The stakes are too high. Trump is the worst political candidate my generation has ever seen.

I am sickened by how evangelical Christians have rallied to Trump. Listen, as a Christian you may not like Hillary. I get it. But to endorse Trump? Your conscience will have to answer for that.

 I know this post is harsher than most found on my blog. But I will not remain silent during such an important moment. I simply wanted to go on record. We may have to agree to disagree. This post is not meant to sway you or change your mind. This post is about me. It's about me wanting to be clear where I stand.